Labelling Destiny

Sometimes, we want something so bad, we label it our ‘Destiny’. Usually when this is applied to a person, we want them to be and share in our lives forever.

Sometimes, people do come in our lives because they are called into it by Destiny, but not always the way we think.People sometimes come to teach us deep and profound lessons about ourselves and the people & things around us so that we can understand our world better and how we fit in it. It is not the person that is our Destiny but the experiences and lessons they bring to our life that we were bound to meet with through them.

Perspective

What is a Perspcetive ?

It is the window through which we choose to see people and circumstances around us. Sometimes, we need to change our window before our view changes, and only then can a new vision be revealed that could not have been seen before.

You will assign roles and labels to people based on your perspective of them and threat them accordingly as you would circumstances.

One of the best views is seen through the window of time. It is amazing how much we see things differently when they are reflected through time.

Perfect/True Love

So, you’re one of those persons who stay in your corner of the world doing your thing thinking that everyone’s so busy with their own lives that they have no time to notice that you even exist.

Then it happens. Destiny brings you the perfect love. They say and do everything so perfectly at first that you can’t believe it is even happening, this is the ‘one’ you have been waiting for all your life.

So now you’re a little bit hesitant, because it all seem so unreal, too good to be true. Hesitance builds into various fears such as insecurity and hurt from past experiences. Fear eventually is confronted by a the inevitable choice of deciding whether or not we will take the risks of falling in love. And if you’re a hopeless romantic, you’ll make that choice for all the reasons and lines on the Hallmark cards and the love poems. You take a chance, you fall in love. Then, you’re left on a random November Sunday to pick up the pieces & make sense of everything that happened because it all happened so quickly.

You start to do out of character things, develop a new routine, things around you seem boring, your thoughts are consumed by that person only and your next mood is determined by their next text or call, you get depressed & frustrated at times, you start to question their genuineness and sincerity, you attempt suicide because you become haunted by your own thoughts, the things that you usually do bore you cause the drama consumes you more than your current realities : work, tv, music, people, and even when you make an effort to do those things it all somehow goes back to the person you’re trying not to think about. Love, madness or mental breakdown ?

It has taken me a while, but with time, comes perspective. Alot of those things really go back right back to us. Thats right, you. Who sets the criteria for Perfect ? You. You define mentally in detail what you will like to have in a person in order for you to appoint them that label. Whether its wealth, smartness, looks, package, age or whatever it is we all have these things figured out in our heads, and when we ‘perceive’ someone to fit that description, we assign them the deep emotions that accompany that label – the label of perfect love, Prince Charming, Cinderella, the ‘One’ who comes on the white horse and sweeps you off your feet and into the sunset to live happily ever after. You treat that person as the one you love because in your head they fit a description for which you have assigned a label. . That person usually says all the right things because they are saying exactly what you want them to – that is why what they are saying is labeled ‘right’.  Again, you have designed a criteria in your head of what you expect such a person to say and even how they say it and when they do, you assign the label of perfect rewarded for matching the criteria in your head. In actuality, you are the one who communicate to that person, consciously or sub-consciously exactly what you want them to say and even how without you probably even realising it half the time.

Of course the other person is not completely blameless, people can screw up your life & mess with your head for no apparent reason at all and don’t even feel sorry about it because someone at some time had done the same to them and they believe that’s how the world works – big deal.

Perspective is the window through which we view the world, including the people in our life. You treat people based on the role you perceive them to play in your life. This perception is informed by pre-determined descriptions in our head. When we believe that person matches your pre-determined description, we assign them a role and a label in our life. As time brings perspective, we start to realise that Prince Charming/ Sleeping Beauty exist in our head only. What we labelled Destiny was us wanting something so bad that we manipulate ourself into believing it is all worth it, even the intense and deep hurt.

People sometimes give an ideal first impression of perfect when the relationship starts. Says & does everything that you want them to. Then just when you fall in love with perfect, the true person is gradually revealed, problem is, you already fell for perfect so you hold on to it with everything you’ve got, hoping relentlessly to bring it back to life. You start to make excuses for them and you start to lie to yourself on their behalf. You start to think that the hurt they cause you is the price you have to pay for them.

Love, experienced in flesh & blood brings us everything I have written about above. Perfect love has a single source – the same one who created you out of it – God.  Whenever we feel perfectly loved by someone, it is because the perfect love of God is flowing through them, from him. That is when we know that he approves of them in our lives,when love starts to feel wonderful, not hurtful, if it hurts, its surely something else.Perfect love does not hurt, it feels wonderful. There is more than a emotional or physical connection, they compliment  you for who you already are without wanting to change anything about you inside or out, help you to seek and serve your Purpose and draws you closer to your creator. Perfect love comes with no price of hurt or conditionality of the flesh (beauty, wealth, age, gender, race etc).

The Totality Of Your Existance

Who or what do you live for ?

If you had to summarise your entire life in one word, what would it be ?

In a single word, who or what defines you ?

Does one person, thing or circumstance define you ?

If you were to drop dead on a random Tuesday of a week that you can’t even remember, who would remember you for the longest time and for what.

If you had a choice, what would you like to be remembered for after you are gone ?

‘Be the best of whatever you are” – Martin Luther King Jr

“If you can’t be a pine on the top of the hill
Be a scrub in the valley—but be
The best little scrub by the side of the hill,
Be a bush if you can’t be a tree.

If you can’t be a highway just be a trail
If you can’t be the sun be a star;;
It isn’t by the size that you win or fail—
Be the best of whatever you are.”

On the death of Michael Jackson

When Jackson planned his final concert tour around the world his intention was for it to be big, redeeming and final. Little did Jackson know that it would be all that and more but not in form of a live concert but a live menorial service for him at the Staples Center in Los Angeles.

Big and final is probaly an understatement if you’ve been following the media attention and public interest over Michael’s death. He’s been called everything from “Biggest pop star ever” to “most recognised international superstar”.

Born black and relativly poor in the US Midwest, Jackson rose to international prominence and fame to become the biggest name in pop ever – thats not a label, its a fact. He’s also been called an ‘accidental civil rights activist’ – paving the way for people like Oprah, Tiger Woods and Obama.

He often sang about peace, love and forgiveness,leaving a legacy and those close to him often testified that he felt great pain whenever he felt hated and judged by that world. But ever since they called Jesus the anti-christ the world has never really ceased to label us and that will not change anytime soon – its the world being it’s natural self.

Despite how you saw him or whether or not you liked him Michael Jackson will always be remembered not for the labels he was given but for music, legacy and Spirit – and those can never be replaced by any label. Love wins.

Rest in peace, MJ, your Spirit lives on.

The lie of label

When you’re born, something big happens to you which you do not recognise at that time. You are assigned a ‘label’ : either the label ‘Boy’ or the label ‘Girl’.

With this label, we live a lieftime fulfilling the roles that come with it : teenage boy, son, man, father, husband. Then sometimes without even recognising it, these roles define who we are and how we see ourself. We start to identify ourself through these roles. Someone asks “who are you?” and you reply be saying “I’m Jane’s husband or John’s father“.

People are born human, grow into boys and girls (through socilisation) and become men and women (through gender roles). Its not hard knowing how to act as a man or woman – the world : your family (having born into a male and female household where gender relations between parents are learnt by children), soceity (the community you live in, American popular culture, media, Tv, music),peers (especially as a teenager, when your friends teach you how to relate to sexually relate to the ‘opposite sex’), school, church are all there to let you know how to fulfill your gender role. We live and see our gender role everyday and through almost everyone. Since the average human seems himself through the eyes of others most of us simply mirror the image reflected to us.

Then one day (and beleive me, time and life experiences always has a way of presenting these days), we start to question who we really are. We realise that the role we play in the life of others is not the sum of our existence. We struggle for identify and question things we’ve done before and decisions we made. We question whether or not it is really our life and ask if that life even resembles us anymore.

That is why I truly beleive that being gay is makes you very special. Not special in the sense that you have a false sense of superiority from everyone else but because being gay challenges you at a very early age to question your label.You are not bounded by the borders created for everyone else, your mind is open to wide possibilities that you would have never seen if you had never questioned that label. It introduces you to a journey of finding yourself  and by doing so finding your purpose and your destiny. Unfortunately, many of us die without ever finding who we were meant to be because we are so busy spending our limited time fulfilling labels given to us by a world that imprisons our mind into thinking it’s the correct and right thing to do because thats the way it has always been done and everyone else is doing it .  For example,the parents of intersexed children(those born with neither male or female reproductive organs but with ambiguous genitals) are given the option to choose what they want their child to be in terms of their gender. Its called “gender assginment“.Corrective surgery is then done to realign the organ of that child to the parent’s desired gender preference. Imagine, that child being assigned a ‘label’ that he or she has to live up to for the rest of their life on earth without even being asked if that is what he or she wants. Despite what reproductive organ we were born with, we are all given a ‘gender assignment’ from birth. And surely, we spend our lifetime taking it for granted that it should never be questioned.

I heard a pastor on Oprah saying that Gay people are special and I understood it but could not rationalise it. It triggered me to find out what he means and more so what it means to me.

I have found my answer. And its a  powerful one that I felt obligated to share. Passing it on is my responsibility. Power to you.

What is time ?

Did anyone ever tell you time is money ? Well guess what, its not true !

It is because we see time as money that we spend a lifetime of our time acquiring physical things after physical things, only to realise one bright Saturday morning when we’re old and time is no more, the real value of time. We also realise that all the things we spent our time acquiring cannot buy us back the precious time lost. The remainder of the time left is spent on analyzing what we did with the bulk of our time and making peace with the fact that we cannot change it. Some even get closer to God through this process that some might call “old age” or if experienced earlier in our life a “mid-life crisis”.

Most of us get married and have children only to make an impression on the sands of time without even realising it,we want to know that even after we die  we will continue to be remembered through the people we leave behind. This emotional investment may outlive our physical existence but is just as temporary and is eventually washed away by the ocean of infinite time. What is this ‘infinite time’ ? Forever.Will you be remembered forever after you die ? Of course not. Your children will continue to re-produce their human kind and eventually in generations far away you will simply be referred to as ‘ancestary’ without any name, picture, personality or accomplishment being attached to your memory. The same applies for the people we invest time in on earth. What happens after ever single person you ever knew on earth dies ? And the thing is, every single one of them will, in time. Then even the people that preserve your memory and legacy are gone and so is your memory. There is nothing or no one to indicate that you ever existed. But this should not scare us, for the reason for our existence is greather than our existence itself and the people & things in it. This is why after your time and death knocks at your door despite how many people love you or how successful or perfect your life is, you will die.

When we’re young we take time for granted. We have so much of it that we assume that it will never run out. As we get older and time  draws  closer (to death) we start to appreciate and value time so much more because of how little of it we have left.
I’ve learnt this past week through a series of emotionally painful experiences that time is a form of energy.This was something I heard before but was given a personal meaning after living it myself.

What and who you give your time to becomes your time, and comes back in time.

Self-discovery

Its a life changing experience that very few have and once you discover it you’re never the same again.

It’s a situation or circumstance that leads you to stop in your tracks and ask the fundamental questions of  your life :

Where did I come from ?

What does all this mean ?

Why am I here ?

Where am I going after this ?

Once you’ve discovered the answers to these questions the core of you existence changes. You start to examine everything and everyone in your life in relation to your answer. This leads to an higher understanding of your life and the people and things in it. The way you see yourself changes entirely and things start to make perfect sense. You begin to see things that you would not have seen before. It opens your mind to truths of the universe that only such a life changing experience can reveal. People might often not understand you or the way you think but that’s because you’re in a place where they are not and therefore cannot understand.

Once you’ve had this transformational experience you’re never the same again. Count yourslef lucky. Most people live out a set of circumstances that appear random and then drop dead, never seeing their life for more than its physical manifestations. A life is a terrible thing to waste.

Everyday Life

We get married, start a family, go to church every Sunday, acquire our dream home and drive an expensive car, high paying job where you are the boss.

Confirming to social institutions of marriage, family and religion leads to us seeing ourselves through the eyes of other people and the role we play in their life. We become a spouse, parent, co-worker, friend, neighbor, relative etc. We take up so many roles that its hard to keep track of what you need to be in front of whom. Your life becomes less about you and the real reason you exist. Your life is not yours’ anymore but reflects a little bit of everyone around you. While we’re busy playing all these roles it becomes easy to loose track of the role we were  destined to play : being  yourself.

Money is a thief of time. We spend so much of our life acquiring physical things only to realise one day when we’re old and grey and time becomes more precious than money that all the things in the world cannot give us back that precious time they took from us to get them.

We sometimes define our life by what we do – I’m a lawyer, doctor, manager, professor,accountant etc.

No human should be defined by the role they play, the things they possess or what they do. We become so caught up in the things & people that make up our everyday life that we fail to realise that people and things around us are parts of a puzzle meant to help us figure out the bigger picture and not be defined by its parts.

The measure of a man is determined by the reason for his existence: his unique  destiny that only he can  serve, not by the people and things that simply guides his existence.

The greatest story ever told

The Easter story is a fascinating one and one and has been called "the greatest story ever told".

The story tells of Jesus facing a judgmental world, which was so blinded by their hateful hearts that they could not see the great  that will forever change their existence. They laughed, called him names and prosecuted him for being only himself. Because in the world, being yourself is simply not acceptable. If you cannot live up to the rules and expectations of the world then you will face the harsh hatred of their hearts.

It tells of Jesus facing a Bureaucracy of hypocritics (The Roman Empire) comprising of Government officials (Pilate, Caesar etc)and the Religious Hypocritics (the “High Priests” of the Church). These were the ones who used the names of God and people to fulfill their self-interest and greed. Thing is, some people actually believed that they were the ‘authority on religion’ and as such were the true and only representatives of God.

And it also tells of Jesus being betrayed and hurt by the ones closest to him during his days on earth. 

The story, although old and routine, has alot of relevance in our world even today.

The world continues to judge us based on what they choose to see and not by the measure of who we are.

We continue to face bureaucracies of religion, tradition, rules and regulations, class, race and organized society.  We see the people that are willing to give up their very self for their things without knowing who made them, where they came from or why they came about. They use these things to form hatred in their hearts in the form of judgments. We see modern “High Priests” in the form of Preachers in churches who use the name of God to the full extent of their own hypocrisy. The claim to be messengers of God but are really messengers of their greed and ego. They preach rules which they themselves do not follow and continue to maintain a class system of “religious supremacy” in which Jesus himself ranked at the very bottom being the non-religious believer he was unlike the religious “High Priests” of the Roman Empire. If you believe in Christ today and you want to find a church you would probably experience parts or most of this “Religious Supremacy”. Membership is not automatic, because believing in God is not a good enough reason to dwell in his house. You might need to be baptized (if you were not already as a child), confirmed and then age over a period of time to attain the rank of “Elder”. Sounds more like a Chain of Command rather than the supposed house of God it was meant to be.

And finally, like Jesus, we are constantly betrayed and hurt by those we care about. We know this too well, we live it everyday.

 

What Jesus had to say

 

To those who judged him with hatred and narrow minds he said “Forgive” them, for they know not what they do.Human knowledge is like a grain of sand in a ocean of secrets. We do what we know. Some of us simply do not know better. Forgiveness is a powerful tool Jesus has passed down to us. It gives us the power to first forgive our self knowing that we are not perfect, it gives us the power to let be knowing whatever happened was for a reason and not because we cannot see it right away means it does not exist and knowing that it was meant to happen for a reason beyond us (destiny), it gives us the power to let go of people and the hurt they represent and reclaiming the power transferred to them (time we spend on thinking about the hurt and feeling the pain that comes from giving it thought) through lack of forgiveness.

To those who use the Lord’s name for vein (self-fulfilling) reasons and who create walls of separation and hatred though Bureaucracies Jesus said fight this with the Power of Love. There is a the reason why this being the greatest commandment of them all. It is only Love that can stand up to any man made systems and come out the winner every time. There is no other tool as powerful as it.

And finally to those closest to us who hurt us we must understand that as long as we invest our trust in humans they are bound to disappoint us – its human nature. It is only when you out your trust in God that you will never be hurt.

Happy Easter Everyone. And remember to apply these precious lessons from the greatest story ever told in your everyday life.

Self Discrimination

Being gay is not what it use to be.

Looking for effeminate behavior to determine one’s gayness is no longer effective. The White world has dramatically shaped the modern gay man. He’s straight looking and often very attractive.

I realised when you identify yourself as gay and you conform to all the stereotypes of what gay is traditionally seen as by the world you become part of your own discrimination.

Seeing yourself as either the male or female partner in the relationship, thinking that top and bottom are the only sexual preference since someone always wants to be the man and the other wanting to be the woman in bed and the general idea that there is always one partner who takes up the role of the man and the other partner taking up the role as the woman in the relationship all  confirm to the stereotypes of how the world traditionally sees Gayness.

Calling your union a ‘Same-sex Marriage” – another form of self discrimination. The world is right, marriage was traditionally meant to be between a man and a woman.Just ask the King of England who created ‘marriage’.  A ‘Union’ of two persons in love is not necessarily traditional marriage. Its quite hypocritical to not conform to the traditions of society (and being gay doesn’t) but wanting to benefit from the traditional label  of ‘marriage’ created by that very society. Labeling a union of love between two men or women with a label created for heterosexual couples is undermining the special bond of same sex unions and their uniqueness. Gay couples are not your traditional couples and their union should not be labeled with a term used to label heterosexual unions. Using the heterosexual label of ‘Marriage’ for gay love is one of the cruelest form of self discrimination.

Love transcends every boundary. It sees no barriers, only possibilities. If you’re in love with another human being there is absolutely no reason why you should not be with them (as long as they feel the same about you, or else you might have a problem). The world will shout every label it knows. But the world would not be the world if it did not.

Homosexuality is deeper than societal discrimination. If one was to examine the root behind the discrimination it will reveal that homosexuality (as society calls it) challenges us to broaden our minds and question our belief systems – the things we hold dear and near and often the things that define how we think. It is much easier to label someone Gay than to analytically and impartially question where the label is coming from.

Judgment is what we use to dismiss that which we do not understand because it does not confirm to our beliefs.

The Power Of Letting Go

 

Letting go of someone is very hard. But we often think letting go means getting rid of that person and cutting them out of our lives forever. Actually, it means the exact opposite.

Letting go means you’ve graduated to the point where you’ve maturely accepted  that you have no real control over the people that enter or leave your life and when you let go of them, or whatever reason you need to, you hand them over into the hands of Destiny and if they were meant to come back then Destiny will create and guide circumstances that will bring that person back into your life at a place and time when they are most needed.

Letting go is powerful because you have given yourself permission to move on which comes from first forgiving  yourself and being mature enough to learn from the experience and move forward. After you have forgiven yourself forgiving the other person becomes a lot easier.When you let go you break free from old bondages and attachments and create new paths for new opportunities that might have been waiting for you to take that step.

Every time you question your decision and you’re tempted to reverse back to what was remind yourself of how far you have come and how much of a better person you are now as compared to then.

People usually come into your life for a defined reason. Its usually part of a life experience. Every new life experience may bring new actors into your life who play  defined roles part of that experience. Learning from the experience and letting go of the person(s) in it is part of preparing yourself for the experience and people ahead. Its one of the natural laws of the universe. People come, people go, whether or not you approve of it.

People are part of life experiences, Experiences come our way so that we can learn from them and better understand yourself and the things around us. A better understanding of Self leads to us getting closer to the reason for our existence. It is only when we identify the reason for our existence that we can seek and serve our Destiny. Everything and everyone goes back to something. Don’t waste time examining the people and circumstances, instead, examine the purpose for their existence in your life and the forces guiding them.

We all play a role in every life we are part of. When our role is complete in one person’s life we leave to play another role in someone else’s life – whether or not we’re aware of it. We live, we die. We laugh, we cry. People come, people go. Just take time to appreciate that they were part of your life and honor that time by choosing to remember all the good things about it, the happiness it brought to you and the things you have learnt from the experience that has contributed to you becoming a better person.

 

 

“If its yours, let it go, if it comes back, it was meant to be, if it never comes back, it was never yours to begin with”

Traditions – a recipe for approval addiction

We see ourselves through the eyes of other people and often live an entire life shaped by what others think and say about us. Most of us lie to ourselves into believing we are in total control of our life – its called denial. The people and things we surround our lives with outside are bound to shape what goes on in our lives inside.

Traditions are one of the ways we seek the approval of others. They pass down from generations to generations without us even questioning them. We often know what we have to do and are even told how we have to do it without understanding where it came from, who created it and why we have to do it. We often carry out traditions because they were carried out by generations before us and if they used to do it well then it must be for a good reason (not that we actually need to know the reason).

I remember reading an article that made mention of a woman who always use to cut the edges of her pie off. Her husband questioned why she did it and she justified it by telling him that her mother did it. So they both called up the mother who said her Grandmother use to do it so she did it too. Thankfully, Grandma was alive to call up too. Grandma told them she use to cut off the edges of her pie simply because baking pans in those days were too small.

A woman upon questioning a pastor asked him if it is acceptable to question her faith. She, like many others, was raised in an religious bureaucracy where religious beliefs were socialized into family traditions. She thought questioning her faith would be punished by God and is unacceptable. Simply do what you are told (she thought) makes one a better Christian. The pastor responded by saying “sometimes questioning your faith leads to a deeper faith”. Instead of “amening and hallulering “ to sermons, how many of us stand up and ask questions about the things we do not understand about the sermon ? Instead we sit and take for granted that whatever is said must be the word of God because the man/woman saying it must be ordained by God himself to say it.

Its also part of us trying to fit in. No one likes to be judged or labeled or rejected so it is human to constantly seek acceptance. Being what others expect you to be is easy – we know what to do and how to do it to gain in order to gain the acceptance of those we seek it from. It is being yourself that is the difficult tasks. It requires bravery and power to be who you truly are. We often spend an entire life shaped by others think and say about us. Then we sit on a chair one sunny Saturday morning and realise  that we have lived an entire lifetime pleasing others and not pleasing our self. Life is not reversible. By this time we lack the strength or energy to change our thinking and start living a life to please our self, free of constant battles of the mind and worrying about how others see us and what they think about us.

 

Being yourself is not only acceptable but Brave and Courageous and honors who you were really meant to be, not what the world makes of you.

Questioning things lead to a higher understanding of them. It is only by questioning things that you get to know more about them. Knowledge is power. Power to make informed choices.Life is a summary of choices. Open your analytical minds wide. See what gets in. It might surprise you.

Taking care of our only home : Planet Earth

Human beings have come a long way.We’ve climbed on top of the food chain, built man made empires , developed technologies that take us into space and has arguably become the most dominant of our kind on earth by mastering the skill of survival. But this very skill has ironically become the reason for the  increasing possibility of human extinction. The same thing that has kept us on earth for so long may be the same thing that wipes us off of earth forever. “Man is both his own best friend and worst enemy”.How true that saying has proven to be.

 

The damage we’ve caused to our only home

Look at what we’ve done to our great oceans and seas. We’ve taken so much out of it and put so many poisons into it. Everyday millions of marine life, mostly fishes, are removed from their natural life in the sea and into fishing boats great and small. Most of them are converted into food for human consumption. We take their life to sustain ours because we see our life as the more important one. Being the king of the food chain has its perks.What’s probably even more unfortunate is the fact that some of these fishes are simply thrown back (dead) into the sea because they are the ‘waste’ catch. They simply have no value after not being selected for food processing. This happens every single day to millions of  fishes and other marine life. Many factories dump enormous amounts of toxic waste ranging from mercury to lead into our water everyday – and get away with it in the name of economic development. 

We’ve killed trees and other forest life so that we can make space for building man-made empires. Urbanization – ‘clearing’ land (aka killing trees) for building has seen thousands of trees brutally chopped down. The worst part is that most of these trees are so old that they are not growing back. But that has not stopped us. Urban centers  continue to expand as natural environments  become distant memories. 

In an effort to satisfy our need for consumption of man made things we’ve built factories and plants across earth in almost every nation. They send out harmful gasses into our air. As a result we are the first inhabitants that were able to single handily change the natural composition of the air. The results are obvious : 2004 Southeast Asia Earthquake, Hurricane Katarina, Flooding that claims thousands in South Asia. And those are only the ones the media selects for us to see. Look at our Arctic, look at the Polar bear trapped on a narrow piece of ice with no where to go and nothing else to do but wait for its eventual inevitable demise. Look at the giant glaciers falling like melted butter.

 

 

The power of oil

Political Scientist have has to coin a new term to explain the intense powers that come with man made fuel – “Energy Superpower”. Oil producers are the new Superpowers of Earth and policy and law makers have fallen subordinate to this bigger power – man made energy. We have seen the major oil producing states and companies taking up their power posts in the past few years – Saudi Arabia, Exxon Mobile etc. The principal reason why the Americans allow the Saudi’s to influence them so much is because of America’s dependence on Saudi oil. So the Americans basically have a suck up foreign policy when it comes to the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia. Russia has developed a foreign policy of using its oil to exercise influence over former Soviet states in Eastern Europe which are heavily dependant on Russia’s oil. The combined annual  salary of the CEOs of the major oil companies would be far greater than the economy of many developed countries like Australia, New Zealand or South Africa. These oil executives have a net worth far bigger than most Heads of States or Presidents. That’s the power of oil.

 

Why we’re damaging our earth

Climate change is bigger than politics, flooding, natural disasters, fossil fuels or oil companies. These are symptoms of the problem. The problem itself is a reflection of what humanity has evolved into in terms of how we think and what we have come to value.

Ancient man had a deep spiritual connection with their mother earth. They earnestly planted seeds into it and it was their sole source of everyday food necessary for natural existence. How many of us today actually plant any of the things we eat to develop that connection with the earth as a direct provider of our food ? Early man also depended on earth’s natural energy – energy from the sun. Today, energy from the sun is largely replaced by man made (fossil fuel) energy, so we’re making our own energy now. Also, early civilizations of the human specie had a deep appreciation for earth’s beauty because they surrounded themselves with it. Today we’ve build living spaces that shut out the beauty of a natural environment and value more the beauty of man made spaces and designs. A recent poll showed that the average teen is capable of naming at least 10 popular brand names as opposed to naming only 5 specie of animals that one would find where he/she lives.

In our quest for man made superficial things we’ve lost touch with our big, blue and beautiful home – the only one we’ve got.

 

Taking our only home for granted

Climate change is not reversible but there are things we can do to minimize the damage that has already occurred and take steps not to further harm our only home. The earth is remarkable and one of a kind because we’re remarkable and one of a kind. It provides conditions for life that we take for granted and the least we can do is to take care of it.

An American scientist after coming back from space spoke about how he looked at how beautiful the earth is from space in all her glory and how he saw his entire life in proportion to this giant floating ball so beautiful and flawless. Every mistake, every degree, every bad hairstyle, every experience bad or good seem insignificant to him because he saw the bigger picture.

 

Harming ourselves

Things are a thief of time. The more things we get the more we build a lifestyle around them.

But scholars agree that if man chooses to continue to harm  earth we are actually hurting ourselves.

The earth has a remarkable capability to re-generate itself, as it has done before. It is billions of years old – it knows more than we do about survival. The earth has all the time in the universe to heal. After us.

Even our bucket list

Its the name of a movie centered around two old men who start to think about dying. But before they ‘kick the bucket’ they make make a list of things they will like to do before.

 

It made me think about how we all make our own bucket list – everyday. Its called the present .It is a reflection of  things we choose to do with the only time we really have.

 

Action expresses priorities.

What’s on your bucket list ?

A purpose driven life

 

The Purpose of Life is a life of Purpose

You were created for something bigger than yourself. Every life has a purpose.After that Purpose is identified and served, that life (you) becomes useless and leaves. A state we refer to as death.

Every person is unique because every Purpose is unique.Something only that person with those exact given characteristics, looks and circumstances can accomplish.God was NOT practicing his human making skills so he can finally get it right.

Ever so often, the average human being lives out a series of circumstances (that includes people) and then simply drop dead. We seldom use our borrowed time to change the lives of others or use that time to serve things greater than us. Things that are greater than us includes things that will live on even after we die.

We spend an entire lifetime gaining  approval, success and recognition and when we die it all goes with us because we’ve used our life  to glorify  self. We use terms lime ‘our’ life  not realising that it was given to us for a purpose other than self-evolution.

When you relaise that there are bigger things in the universe than self you start to see yourself in proportion to them and you are humbled into serving things bigger than you – giving back, empowering others, changing lives, serve your destined cause and ultimately the one who has given the life to you- God.

Everyday the sun does down, it takes part of your life with it.
What are you doing on a daily basis to seek and serve your purpose ?

 

What you do for yourself dies with you, what you do for others will live on.

How have you used your life to make a difference that is bigger than yourself and will live on even after you’re gone ?

The consciousness behind your thoughts

We often complain about being victims of situations and circumstances that are beyond our control. We often complain about other people’s contribution to our negative experiences.

 

While we’re often busy allocating blame to people and even sometimes the devil and God we fail to acknowledge our own contribution to our failures.

 

Instead of complaining about being a victim of circumstance, become the consciousness behind them by asking yourself how much does the people and things you surround yourself with influence your thoughts and consequently those circumstances. When you become the consciousness behind your thoughts you take responsibility for failures and give yourself permission to learn from them.

The Judgment of others

We judge that which cannot be understood.

It’s the imperfect mortal’s way of dismissing that which the human mind refuses to consider because of a lack of knowledge and limited life experience.

When we judge something or someone we do it based on what we believe as against what is presented for judgment: These beliefs are influenced by two things :knowledge and experience.

A narrow mind judges because it can only see what which previous knowledge and experience allows it to  see. This prevents it from seeing what/who is actually presented. There is no space in its narrow path for anything else to pass through apart from those that are pre-approved (things that are understood because they confirm to what we believe.

When someone judges it tells of how restricted and limited they are in both knowledge and experiences. It also indicates a choice to label something/someone simply because they do not understand it rather than taking the time to understand it. If you do take the time to do this you might even learn something about yourself and what was preventing you from understanding it.

The more you gain knowledge, the more you are humbled into relaising how much you really do not know. Experience teaches wisdom. Unless your reading this from the great beyond you are still learning.So no one really has the universal knowledge nor the eternity of time to pass judgment.

When we judge, we limit ourselves and prevent self from possibly venturing into new places of though and awareness.

The judgment of others should reveal more about them rather than you.

Keep your mind wide open. You might be surprised at what/who gets in.

Everyone happens for a reason

 

People always come into your life for a reason, a season and a lifetime. When you figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed outwardly or inwardly. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, or to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or even spiritually. They may seem like a godsend to you, and they are. They are there for a reason,you need them to be. Then, without any wrong doing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die, Sometimes they just walk away. Sometimes they act up or out and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and it is now time to move on.

When people come into your life for a SEASON, it is because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They may bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season. And like Spring turns to Summer and Summer to Fall, the season eventually ends.

LIFETIME, relationships teach you a lifetime of lessons; those things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person/people (anyway);, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas in your life.

“no man is your friend, no man is your foe, everyman is your teacher”

Bullies

 

Bullies are hard to stand up to.They represent more than mind control and manipulation. Bullies are attached to internal fears inside us.

When we deal with the physical bully, we take the first step in dealing with the internal fear the bully mirrors. 

Pretending that the fear and it’s bully does not exist does not make it go away. It becomes worst and uncontrollable. Running away from the bully is not the answer.The internal fear remains and will be reflected in another bully wherever you run to. 

When u deal with a bully u are  liberated to graduate from that fear and and permission to move on is earned.

Whether u use your bullies to become a better person or feel hopelessly sorry for yourself is up to you.

Sometimes the only way pass it, is through it.

Nov 16 11:31 AM

Being Present In Your Life

 

A few years ago experiences came my way that prompted me to realize that the fundamental questions in life are the most profound a human can ask self.Questions like Who Am I, What does all this mean, Where did I come from and Where am I going.

As I ventured to find answers little did I know that my life as I knew it would forever be transformed.Some call it a light bulb moment, some call it a breakthrough and even sometimes a age crisis but whatever u call it, it is a time in your life when something or someone has forced you to stop and analyze your life thus far.Your successes, failures, accomplishments and regrets, relationships, your childhood and family , things that you’ve suppressed so they can go away but never really did, your deepest fears, your biggest demons. U start to analyze the very core of what makes you, You.

Most people live an entire lifetime and never have such a moment because they are so busy living life that they don’t have time to ask any of the why, what or how questions.

To help us answer these questions, life gifts us People and circumstances. Every experience  (bad or good) has a gift. If your are able to find that gift you liberate yourself from that experience and you are able to move forward. If not you will keep repeating the same mistakes until you do.

Every person, bad or good, comes into your life for a reason.Usually to teach u about who u r and why u r here.

When you start to find these answers through the people, things and circumstances around you You become present in your life and nothing or no one seem the same again. Your entire view of yourself and your world, changes.

Life is what happens to you while you’re living it.

Do u want to live out a set of experiences and then drop dead or Do u want to be Present in your life. You Get To Choose.

Aug 27 3:22 PM

Excerpt from Return to Love

Dec 7 5:06 PM

 

Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate,
but that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us.

We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,
gorgeous, handsome, talented and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God within us.
It is not just in some; it is in everyone.
And, as we let our own light shine,
we consciously give other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.

 

By Marianne Williamson

Lost ?

Apr 9 10:29 PM

Stand still. The trees ahead and bushes beside you
Are not lost. Wherever you are is called Here,
And you must treat it as a powerful stranger,
Must ask permission to know it and be known.
The forest breathes. Listen. It answers,
I have made this place around you.
If you leave it, you may come back again, saying Here.
No two trees are the same to Raven.
No two branches are the same to Wren.
If what a tree or a bush does is lost on you,
You are surely lost. Stand still. The forest knows
Where you are. You must let it find you.

by David Wagoner

Are you really listening

Feb 28 8:44 PM

A journey is not a trip.

It’s not a vacation.

It’s a discovery.

It’s about yourself.

It’s a discovery about ourselves.

It not only allows us to see the world,

but how we fit in it.

Do you determine your journey,
Or does it determine you ?

Believe it or not I heard this on a car  advertisement on TV. Its amazing what you can hear with an open mind.

Our great teacher

Sep 1, 2007 9:22

 

Its interesting how Life acts like a Teacher.

It uses life experiences to teach us things that would ultimately make us better.Then it evaluates how well we’ve grasp those lessons by testing you.

Life is indeed your greatest teacher, not an academic in a classroom.Actually being academically smart is the lowest level of Intelligence.Common sense and practical life skills surpasses it by far.Don’t take my word for it, do you own research.

The fact of the matter is humans  are practical, active learners.They learn by doing.

Life is your teacher, the world is your classroom, experiences are your lessons, the past is your learning aid, the future is your chalkboard, the present is your board eraser. Are you taking notes ?

A New Earth: Awakening your life’s purpose

Apr 9

This book was an Oprah Book Club selection that caught my attention.

Here are some interesting (and random) thoughts from this book :

* While being caught up in the interim (life), we often do not ask about our beginning (where we came from, why we came) or our end (where we are going).

*  Rather than being your thoughts and feelings behind consciousness behind it.

*  Life will give you experiences to help you awake your purpose.

How do u know this experience is meant to help u ? Because it is happening now.

*There is no death, energy does not dissolve, it is transformed and lives in some other form.

The Serenity Prayer

 

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

–Reinhold Niebuhr

Time is a Thief

Aug 8 12:06 PM

 

I’m not one to plan. I make a conscious effort not to do it as much as humanly possible.

I realize a long time ago that planning is our way of coping with the fact that time is not granted to us. So we make plans to console ourselves into believing that we have more time.
Even if we do get the time we plan for we are humbled into realizing that time has plans of its own and life often does not turn out the way we want it to.
Instead on spending ‘time’ on Planning, take time to be present in your Life, take time to be aware of the people and things around you now.

I believe everything happens for a reason. I do not believe that the term "Present" is a co-incidental synonym for ‘Gift’. Your present is the only time you may have remaining
Take time to be present in your Present.
Live your best life, Today.

Who you really are

Aug 8 12:05 PM

 

When asked who we are, we would probably respond by pointing out our roles and accomplishments.
We use terms that identifies us in relation to others : son, husband, wife, girlfriend, boyfriend ,brother, aunt, neighbor ,friend , employee and the list goes on. Sometimes we say we’re a Engineer or Doctor or a Manager or a qualified graduate of a prestigious school.
Most times you quote the label given to you at birth : I am John Public.
But are you really any of those things ?
Does your real identity have anything to do with any of your accomplishments in life, the roles that you have or your birth name ?
Are you your birth name ? Are you your profession ? Are you your accomplishments ? Are you your relationships ?
Do any of those things define who you are inside ? Does any of them help you to understand where you came from, the reason for your existence or where you’re eventually going ?
Who you are is deeper than what you do for a living or your achievements in life or how much wealth you acquire or how others see you.
Only you can answer the question. And your mouth just might not be the source of the answer.

Perfect beauty : Not skin deep.

Dec 7 5:17 PM

I am not my hair, my eyes, my nose or my mouth. I am not my skin or the shape of any of my body parts. I am not the IQ of my brain. I am not the sound of my voice or the volume of my laughter. I am not my strengths or any of my weaknesses. I am not the level of my skills. The temple of my physical makeup is a culmination of genetics. It reveals nothing about the person who resides within. I take no credit or point no blame for the way I look. My temple is perfect, as is. This body is not who I am. It is an exquisitely perfect dwelling for my soul. Everything about it is exactly as it should be. No other, anywhere, ever, could serve my soul as well. I am not anything you can see with your eyes or touch with your hands. Should you judge me by that criteria, you will never know me. I am not a dumping ground for bias that’s based on a man-made standard, and I do not accept the prejudice it creates. I am a union of body, mind and spirit, a trio, not a solo. To know me, is to know yourself. Those who hear the voice of their soul, recognize the song in mine. They do not stop at the front door and judge me by the dwelling in which I reside. With a humble sense of honor, they knock upon the door and ask to come in. The judgment of others does not change who I am. Quite the opposite is true. It reveals who they are. Those who deem me unworthy at a glance and pass me on by, have my blessing to keep walking, for they have a long way to go. They have not reached the point in their journey where they are able to see and appreciate me for who I am. I will accept no less.

Now, how do you see yourself ?

Normal is Boring

Aug 8 12:04 PM

 

In a world where being yourself is not good enough we so often find ourselves trying to fit in – struggling to keep up with a particular image so that people can see you the way you want them to.
Being normal is quite easy. We see ourselves through the eyes of others so we know exactly how to act among different because we know what they expect of us and if you’re the average Joe you give them what they want to see. Mostly to avoid their judgment of the real you or a fear of rejection that the real you might not be good enough for them.
It is being your unique self that is the real challenge. It requires honesty from within, not wanting to be liked by others and a deep connection with the things that make you, You.
When you realize how unique you really are it becomes reason enough to want to be yourself.
Why fit in when you can stand out ? Fitting in is easy, standing out is what is hard.
Take time to be yourself, in every way that makes you unique. If others don’t understand you then it’s not because you are the weird one in a normal word, its because you are probably the only ‘normal’ one in a weird world.
Are you bold enough to be yourself ?
The world is a huge stage. The hardest role to play is yourself.

Choices and Destiny

May 30 2:41 PM

 

Free-Will is one of the most precious gifts of God’s love for his children. We make mistakes, we learn, we become better persons, grow closer to our very purpose and by doing so grow closer to our very maker.

Free-Will allows us freedom to choose. And really, our life is a summary of choices made or ignored.

I believe in Destiny but I also believe in power of choices.

You see, a lot of things in life we get to choose. But people and circumstances designed to help us to get closer to serving our Purpose are simply not decided by us because those things are bigger than us and even bigger than life itself. What’s bigger than life ? The Purpose of life.

Thinking that you can control everything that happens to you by choices you make is a fundamental insecurity that stems from a desire for control which often comes about when we feel we have to take life into our own hands because we have been treated unfairly by life.

The human being in us is naturally insecure and egotistical and cannot deal with the possibility that there may be another force (like Destiny) in control our life as well.So our human tricks us into believing that we can truly control who and what happens to us by the decisions we make to determine our own destiny.

If this was true, then we will all be Gods of our own universes.Things that are bigger than us are simply not decided by us.

The irony is when things go bad we’re often prepared to blame every other force (God, people & circumstances)but ourselves when bad choices or poor judgment present their consequences and we’re left to face our own internal demons.

Finding purpose in life

Mar 23 8:06 PM

 

Moments with my thoughts proved to be very revealing.

Every life has a purpose and every human that occupies that

life has a responsibility to seek and serve it. 

Unfortunately, many of us take many things for granted and simply life out a set of circumstances, meet and set of people and then drop dead without asking our self questions like why are we here or what does all these things on Earth really mean.

It was because of this that I thought how simple it would be if we were told what exactly we would have to do and how long we have to do it.But then that seemed robotic.

Sounds like more than a robot than human – having a specific task to complete in a limited sphere of time.How boring would that be ?

Its really amazing how free humans are and how much the destiny allows us to do these things on our own instead of programming us like robots with an expiration date. 

Discovering our Purpose on earth helps us to discover our very self.Then life and people fall into perspective – the bigger picture.

What’s yours ?

Loosing Self Sovereignty

Aug 25, 2007 6:49 PM

A friend once said to me if you do not want to hear something back then don’t say it to anyone else but yourself.

When you tell other people things you normally would keep to yourself you give up some extent of self-sovereignty. When you give away a secret you also give away the power that comes with it like  control and manipulation.

Secrets are one of the things that make us unique.They are very powerful. When you give your secrets to other people, you also transfer to them some amount of that power which can never be regained.

People that come back into you life

Past situations that have repeated themselves got me thinking. I mean after all this time, despite how much you think you have moved on and grown, the past has a way of coming back to haunt you.Never really does go away completely.

So then why does this happen. If experiences come your way to make you better and you’ve learnt your lesson from them and moved on then why would events  repeat themselves ?

Probably because you did not learn what was intended for you to learn, didn’t learn anything at all ( in which case ure bound to relive the same set of circumstances repeat) or maybe those circumstances are back to teach you something that they were not able to teach you then. Giving you a second chance to learn from them.

We often find ourselves frustrated when the past repeats itself. Feel as if we did not make any real progress and we’re stuck in one place over and over and not being able to get out.

So you see the past does not come back to haunt you. It comes back to teach you something it was unable to teach you back then.

Words of Wisdom

Career

Do what u love, you’re bound to succeed at it.

One of life’s greatest gifts is doing a job worth doing

Forgiveness

Forgiveness does not mean forgive & forget, it means giving yourself the freedom to move on and not want to change what happened.You forgive for You,if the other person gets it, its a bonus.Holding on to forgiveness is like taking poison and expect the other person to die.

Problems

Don’t focus on ure problems, what u focus on expands. Instead, focus on things u can start doing to change them.
Every problem has a surface issue & a root issue. We often address the surface issue and ignore the root issue
Problems either make u bitter or better.
There is more to you than your errors and mistakes, they do not define a entire you.

Experience

Experience teaches wisdom, if u don’t learn from them, u’re bound to repeat them.
Every experience, be it bad or good, has a gift.
Everything happens for a reason, we just don’t see it right away.
Experiences can either make us Bitter or Better.Which one it turns out to be is completely up to you.No man is your friend, no man is your for, but every man is your teacher.

Happiness

An internal peace (being contended) with your present circumstances, whatever they may be because of a mature understanding that they were meant to be exactly that way and recognizing despite how much effort we make to change them, we have no real control over them.

We attract happiness in our own lives by the things we give our time to and the people we surround ourselves with.

If your source of happiness is a human being – you’re bound to be disappointed, if it’s from a material possession – it’s bound to be temporary, if it’s from yourself (your accomplishments, image, success), ur bound to be greedy and self-serving.

Being happy is an everyday constant choice to accept the things we cannot change and appreciate that every moment should be celebrated for the unique time and space it takes up eroding our lives.

Love

You should be the first example of how to Love and treat You.

You teach others how to love and treat u by how u love and treat yourself.

Love can either be a Noun or a Verb.

House Maintenance (Friday, July 25, 2008)

An Irish doctor on his dying bed was asked how he is feeling (a typical question from a concerned relative). He responded by saying ‘ I feel wonderful but I live in an old house’.

Now that is what you call deep. On the surface, the average person might have wanted to inspect the doctor’s living quarters to possibly identify anything that would have caused him to fall sick. But the doctor was not referring to his physical home, he was referring to his dying body.

Our bodies provide physical shelter to our spirit and soul.Taking care of our bodies is like house maintenance for the spirit and soul.

You cannot appreciate life fully and live your best life everyday unless your accommodations are accommodating.

The following is a list of things that you might want to do to maintain you house/body well.

* Diet – food is more than what you choose to put into your mouth. If you respect your body, it will respect you back. Our bodies have a remarkable way or speaking to us.Just listen with an open mind (and make sure its not the radio)

* Daily exercise – little things like stretching and running in the morning can go a long way.

* Sleep – at least eight (8) hours is ideal

* Avoid stress – stress is more than having a lot on your shoulders to deal with. There are biological (mind you I am no doctor here) functions in our bodies that formally recognizes and processes stress in our bodies.
Stress is the number one ager. If your see a 40 year old looking 60 the likelihood is s/he has a stress level that’s aiming for the sky.

* Be yourself – pretences and image maintenance can take their toll on our mental and physical health. Take time to pursue your passions, you’ll be giving your insecurities a well deserved vacation.

* And finally, Sex, yes sex – sex has been researched and proven by experts to drastically make you look and feel better.Now you have a health license to have great sex. And they say life isn’t fair.

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